Posted by alexandra_k on October 12, 2006, at 6:19:23
In reply to I messed up so bad, posted by alexandra_k on October 12, 2006, at 6:12:21
and i do this. self destruct every now and then. why did i do it? i wanted to feel loved for a while. i didn't want to be alone. and i understand that. i understand the rules of the game. but now i feel ashamed. dirty. aching all over. don't sh*t in your nest. that is good advice. but i've broken that. and word... will get around. self destruct. that has to be it. no other explanation. i'm going to feel dirty every time they look at me like they are looking at me now. it will blow over, won't it? but first... word will get around. i think i've done something... irrevokable. but then... it always feels this way. but then when it feels that way... oftentimes... it is.
poster:alexandra_k
thread:693465
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20061012/msgs/694053.html