Posted by muffled on August 21, 2006, at 13:44:15
In reply to Re: I SCREWED up dammmit :-(, posted by Estella on August 17, 2006, at 7:51:08
**Hey Estella!
> I don't think you screwed up sweetie. Really. Really really really really. Can you write down some of your concerns? I used to do that sometimes. Write them down and give them to t and let t keep them so t can have a think about them. Sometimes t's need time to process stuff just like we need time to process stuff.
***I thinks thats an absolutely BRILLIANT idea!
My T will love you for it! LOL.
>
> From stuff that you have said it sounds like you have a good t. You have told her stuff and you were really scared about how she was going to take it, and she really pulled through for you.***She HAS. Thank you for reminding me.
With parts... Sometimes t's aren't sure about them... Aren't sure about whether they are qualified to work with somebody who has them. Some clinician's feel the same way about substance abuse too. Especially when they haven't been told much about what do do if a client presents with those issues. Sometimes they are just told to pass the client on to somebody else who has been trained.**I dunno what she's been told. She has said she hasn't dealt with someone so separated b4, so doesn't know much about it. She has said in the past that I can still see her even if I get a referral to elsewhere for other stuff.
>
> I'm kinda distinctive in that I don't think a t needs special training in how to do therapy with someone who has parts. But that being said I've found different t's to be more or less helpful... Same goes for substance abuse. I had one t who really freaked about my substance abuse. She tried to pass me on to someone else who was trained in it. Truth be told I found her a whole heap more helpful than the specialist substance abuse t.***Yeah, my T is game to try anything, I'll give her that. She's no chicken at all. She all nicey, nicey, but I'm starting to realize that under all the niceness that she tough as a boot!!! ;-)
Y'know, substance abuse and mental illness often go hand in hand it seems to me....
>
> It might be that your t has only heard about parts in the context of some fairly... um... 'out there' strategies for treating people with parts. What she may have temporarily forgotten is that she has been seeing you for... How long now? And you are the same person you always have been...***Yeah, when I talked to her she seemed ok I guess....
>
> > Then she said it was cuz ethically she can't deal with such cuz she doesn't have experience with someone so separated.
Yeah. I've heard that one before... Maybe you could reassure her a bit? How do you envisage therapy changing from how it was progressing before? Would you like to talk about your parts with her? Would you like her to meet your parts? Maybe you could write a little about that and you guys could discuss it?***Again, EXCELLENT questions. Mostly I have been dealing with what I call my 'people', on my own. They are not that separate really. So its not like they will specifically speak to her. Sometimes they have written stuff.
>
> >She kept trying to make me understand that its all just me. I KNOW THAT.
>
> Yeah. I guess... She doesn't know that you know that, though. Maybe... You could tell her that too? How you view your parts. The sense you make of them. Why you think of them as parts. Stuff like that. She probably didn't know what to say...***I DID tell her that I knew that. But your right. I usu. say very little, and was quite adamant bout my 'people', so she proly was taken aback.
> > Then I went off bout evil stuff and bout whether she has really experienced evil etc.
>
> You kinda... Push her away a bit to see whether she will stick around or reject you. I do that. Maybe I'm projecting that on to you...***YES. Thats been an ongoing thing with us, that we have touched on some.
>
> > I'm FINALLY being totally honest and straight w/her and now I freaking that it was the wrong thing to do.
>
> Yeah, you kinda are... I guess that... Maybe you need to do a little more now. Tell her that you think she CAN help you and that you don't see any use for a specialist etc. Tell her about how you view them and the understanding you have of them etc. Tell her what kinds of things you think she could help you with.***Once again, excellent questions. I hope you don't mind if I bring your post to my next appt?
>
> It is kinda hard... I understand.
>
***Thanks so much Estalla.
Take care,
Muffled
poster:muffled
thread:676871
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060808/msgs/678736.html