Posted by Tamar on June 30, 2006, at 19:47:01
In reply to Re: This isn't fun any more » Tamar, posted by ElaineM on June 30, 2006, at 16:41:35
Hi Elaine,
> It sometimes can reach panic-mode when I can't access people in my head - like they've disappeared, if I can't always see them infront of me. It's a pretty frantic feeling. You sound a bit like that.
Yes, that’s it! I do feel a bit frantic. I want to reach out and find him and he’s not there.
> I've been allowed to take a picture of one of my T's before. Have you ever mentioned that to him? If not a picture, does he ever let you keep a memento or something? Or is that just something he's always evasive about. I think it makes alot of sense for you to feel that you need to hold onto his actual image. The best I can describe it is, when I couldn't, it was almost like meeting a stranger every session. I had to have faith in the consistency of the idea AND image of her, before the trust could come.
Gosh, I love the idea of having a picture of him. I think it’s great that your former therapist let you take a picture. You’re right: it’s about consistency of both idea and image. And I need them both in order to feel the trust. I will ask him and see what he says.
> I don't know if that's exactly how you feel, but I think talking about a picture would be worth a shot. I just don't know how your T would react. I don't understand some of his respones. (though to be fair to you both, I only know of him from a few threads)
Ha ha! No, I don’t understand some of his responses either. To be fair to him, he has made it clear that he is committed to doing therapy with me. I just wish I could get him to understand why I want the things I can’t have…
> I'm so sorry that you can't get any comfort from therapy right now, especially when you feel so scared.
>
> Thinking of you.
> With hugs, EL(((((Elaine))))) Thanks so much. And I’m sorry I haven’t replied to your thread yet. There’s so much I want to say and yet I can’t seem to find the right words of comfort and support. I’m very inarticulate when I’m depressed. But I’m thinking of you too, and desperately wishing I could do something to make things easier for you.
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:662944
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060623/msgs/663024.html