Posted by Jost on June 16, 2006, at 13:16:28
In reply to Re: I would, posted by fallsfall on June 16, 2006, at 12:57:46
Hi, Dinah.
I'm somewhat horrified by this turn of events with your T. Not having been on psychobabble very long, I dont' know the history, except the latest part about the struggle about whether to leave where you were. Your relationship with your T was a deciding, if not the deciding, factor, as it seemed.
If that's so, then you have a very deep involvement or dependency on this person, and it sounds as though, whatever his good and helpful or engaging qualities, he is a deeply unreliable person.
That sounds a very problematic combination (your reliance and his unreliability). If he didn't mention being away, or the possiblity of being away (since jobs don't drop out of the sky without someone's at least signing up to be considered, usually), while encouraging you to stay in N.O. to see him regularly, it sounds really unethical to me. Certainly unprofessional. And very very untrustworthy.
How can you stop your relationship in a helpful-to-you way? Just cutting your T off angrily or impulsively, or just half-sticking it out in the hope that you will someday (or even soon) be able to slip away easily both seem unrealistic, and not in your best interest.
At least have a consultation with another T, for a number of sessions. This is not a situation that you should be in alone-- and this T doesn't sound as if he's someone who has the self-awareness or disinterestedness to cope and to help you make a transition to someone who can be a reliable person.
I really feel for you in this.
Jost.
poster:Jost
thread:657367
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060615/msgs/657619.html