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Re: do you ever wish...? » sunnydays

Posted by Poet on April 19, 2006, at 18:20:20

In reply to do you ever wish...?, posted by sunnydays on April 19, 2006, at 18:02:49

Hi sunnydays,

For awhile my T had me journaling. So I not only deny things I said, but things I wrote and let her read.

I try very hard to paint a pretty picture that my childhood wasn't that awful. That if anything bad did happen to me that it was my fault. Problem is I contradict myself and my T always points it out. *That's not what you said a few minutes ago...* Or *since when?* It's okay that she's blunt with me, I am not easy to work with and when she's blunt I listen.

<<I just want my life to be nice sometimes and it's hard to accept that it wasn't, although I have the potential to make it better in the future.

Me too, only I don't have the optimism that I have the potential to make it better. Though I've stuck it out in therapy for 3 1/2 years, so part of me must want to stop denying and dodging, right? Maybe?

Poet

 

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