Posted by happyflower on April 5, 2006, at 20:15:31
Well I told him everything about how I am feeling. He made it so easy for me, he was so understanding and so kind. I guess all of us has issues of one kind of another, even T's, even people who seem to have it all together, so I am not alone.
I told him I don't ever talk about my innermost feelings and he said well that is what he is there for. I said I was trying. But he knows I am having a hard time with my marriage and it is triggering feelings from my past. He said all the good stuff I am doing, won't cover up the void I am feeling about my marriage. It is too big of a hole to fill up.
I feel really good to confide in him, I wasn't pulling the wool over his eyes.. I guess it just seemed like he didn't know how bad I felt because I would say something like nobody has ever loved me or nobody really cares about me, and he would correct my black and white thinking on this. But he still understood how I felt.
We talked a lot about all kinds of stuff, joked around about stuff, and he generally made me feel like I am okay. I asked him what he thought of me. He said I am in a very sad situation with my marriage, I am doing good with the social stuff, music stuff, and exercising stuff, but what he still needs to work on with me is my blanket thinking especially when it comes to myself. He said he thinks it is due to not having enough self convidence in myself.
So now this is making me think now on what I say to myself and think is due to low self esteem. Now I feel like I have to watch what I say and how I say it.So I got out my feelings, asked him what he thought of me, and asked more about boundry issues when we see each other at the gym. So I guess I got a lot done today. He even put his hand on my back for a second as I was leaving when he said goodbye. I feel so much better tonight. He was so kind and gentle I didn't even fall apart, I felt safe, he was great with me. :-)
poster:happyflower
thread:629429
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060325/msgs/629429.html