Posted by Tamar on March 11, 2006, at 18:25:13
In reply to Choices, its all about choices isn't it?, posted by muffled on March 11, 2006, at 18:04:19
> We make choices....
Yeah... and some of our choices are freer than others...
> to be good
> to be bad
> to do things that are good for us
> to trash ourselves
> to live
> to die
> to try
> to give up
> to love
> to hate
> to trust
> to fear
> .....Your words remind me of Ecclesiastes 3: there's a time to be born and a time to die, and so on...
And yet, can we really *choose* to love or to fear? Those are very strong emotions that don't respond well to rational thought (in my experience)
> WHY do I make bad choices?????????????????????????
> WHY?
> When I KNOW its bad.
> WHY?
> MuffledWell, it sounds to me as if the answer you're implying is that you make bad choices because you're a bad person. And I happen to know that's not true. I happen to know you're a wonderful person.
So if you make bad choices, perhaps it's because you're afraid to make different choices. Perhaps you have been hurt after making good choices, and it seems easier to make bad choices. Maybe you can't imagine things being different. Maybe you're very anxious about your choices.
It’s easy for other people to judge and criticize. It’s easy to beat ourselves up about it. But in fact we make whatever choice seems right at the time, even when we know it’s not perfect. And there are reasons why it seems right at the time. Knowing why we make the choices we make is a step towards making choices we feel more comfortable with.
Stay safe…
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:619010
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060225/msgs/619020.html