Posted by Racer on March 3, 2006, at 15:14:33
In reply to Re: Narcissistic Mother of my Grandchildren, posted by NanaS on March 3, 2006, at 12:27:15
There is a way to email back and forth -- it's called BabbleMail, and it allows people to email through Dr Bob's without sharing personal email addresses. You don't have it turned on, but Dinah does. If you go to https://dr-bob.securesites.com/cgi-bin/pb/signup.pl you can update your registration to allow BabbleMail, then you can email privately, without giving out your email address.
As for your DIL, I agree with Dinah -- what will it change if she does have NPD? Whether she has it or not, she'll continue to be unpleasant, right? Makes more sense to me to try to find a way to deal with her that works better for you and for your grandchildren.
What that would be, though, I can't advise. There's no point in trying to get her to get help, because her behavior is apparently working well for her. You could encourage your son to get some help, which would change the situation in some way, but he has to make that decision for himself, when it comes right down to it. What you can do, though, is find a way to get help for yourself. You could try to find a support group for grandparents, preferably one run by a therapist who has some training in how to get the best result for the children, or you could look for a therapist whom you could see to help you figure out how to avoid getting exploited by this woman's behavior. If I were going to pick, I'd say find that therapist, and then discuss whether a support group would be a good adjunct.
Good luck, to you and to your grandchildren.
poster:Racer
thread:615027
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20060225/msgs/615471.html