Posted by Tamar on December 19, 2005, at 3:40:36
In reply to Hello..new here and long post (triggers ), posted by PreemieNurse on December 18, 2005, at 22:59:05
Hello and welcome!
Thanks for sharing your story. I agree with Tarabara: I’m really impressed at how far you’ve come, and at your courage in telling your therapist about your feelings of love.
I think when you fall in love with a therapist it’s very special and certainly not just part of the process. I’m sure that when it happens it means there’s a particular kind of special connection between the therapist and the client. It’s not all in your mind; it’s a function of the real relationship and the way you interact when you’re in the room together. And just because he interprets it symbolically, that doesn’t mean it isn’t real.
I know what you mean about wanting him. I want my therapist too, particularly when I’m having a hard day or I’m feeling depressed. I know you say you’re fighting it, but in my own experience I found that fighting it made it worse and was more painful. But I know it can be difficult to believe you’re allowed to want him. Sometimes it’s hard to believe that wanting him is a good thing, particularly because it hurts so much. The thing that helped me was to try to focus on the part of it that felt good, because it was the only way I could accept that there was something good about it…
It sounds to me as if you’ve been working very hard in therapy. I know the feeling of having to go deeper. It’s scary. Have you talked to your therapist about how to do it? You might need to take it very slowly indeed. I hope it goes well.
Tamar
poster:Tamar
thread:590262
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051216/msgs/590307.html