Posted by alexandra_k on November 15, 2005, at 15:43:09
In reply to Re: In therapy- whose job is it to get you better? » alexandra_k, posted by kerria on November 15, 2005, at 13:38:38
> Thank you Alexandra for writing.
:-)
Thats okay.
Thanks for thanking me :-)
> My parts wreck and really damage my relationships and make me look stupid. They are opposites and off the deep end. No one lives like that- they're not balanced. We balance out each other but one at a time they're terrible representatives of the human race.((((Kerria)))))
It really can be hard.
And... I'm sorry things are so very hard for you.
> You're right. i need to listen - maybe they wouldn't act so disruptive but it's so hard to do.Yeah, it can be really very hard.
Especially... When they are extreme and fairly intense in their views.
And we think... Their views are horrible
Uncharitable
Wrong
Whatever.
And we just want them to shut up and go away :-(
But...
What they say is just what a 'part of you' thinks...
And...
You know 'better' in a sense...
You have more information...
And if they could incorporate some of what you think as well...
(If you can tell them a little about what you think and why you think it)
Their extremism and intensity might well lessen off...I think it is just about...
Listening to them respectfully
(The way we should try and be with other people)
And encouraging them to listen respectfully in return.
You are still allowed to disagree...
But maybe its about promoting the positive things...
Rather than being too constrained by the fear and disagreement.> i need someone to jumpstart communication.
Maybe...
> i can't change my life. we're too unstable and not able to go it alone now- especially now. It would be a worse mess.
Yeah. I never meant to suggest about doing it alone... I just think... That what you really need... Is someone to help you figure out how to do this. Because... I really do believe that you (and your parts) know what you all need to do to get better. It is just... About someone helping you figure out what is already known to you (if that makes sense). To empower you... Rather than to depower you...
> Thank you for still talking to me.Thats okay.
>i know i'm a study in frustration for anyone who tries to help. It's really hard for me to get through the separations.
Its okay.
I just think...
Maybe you need a little more credit with respect to the answers being within you...
Helping you access that...:-)
poster:alexandra_k
thread:578525
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051107/msgs/579014.html