Posted by Annierose on November 14, 2005, at 18:01:34
In reply to Re: Knowing and not knowing... » Annierose, posted by daisym on November 13, 2005, at 17:24:11
Daisy -
In the midst of my wallowing, I think I missed this reply.
Have you and your sister ever spoken about "it" since? Even though you weren't able to back her up then, I imagine if you were able to have that conversation with just her, now, it could be healing for the both of you. Of course, I don't know what your relationship is with her. Knowing that even at age 5 she remembers being touched must help your adult self feel for little Dasiy, help her know that this isn't something she pulled out of thin air.
I don't think one can ever fully answer the question of "why" except your father. And it does sound from your posts, that denial has served him well. I would feel rage towards my mother as well. It's such a complicated and terribly sad outrage you lived through. And you did live through it.
Now my T would say that we have to put words to it and look at it from all angles, again and again. So that we own our past, instead of living in fear from it. Not an easy step. But I think we will get there.
poster:Annierose
thread:577897
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051107/msgs/578725.html