Posted by ClearSkies on October 11, 2005, at 19:36:53
In reply to Re: I don't like my therapist » ClearSkies, posted by terrics on October 11, 2005, at 19:11:00
I'm trying to think this out. I have a real aversion to the "tough love" approach to life. I have always been a real tenderfoot, and it's become much worse since I sank into my depression and anxiety. My instinct since then has been to run away when confronted rather than make myself uncomfortable. That's what I sense with my ambivalence with this therapist. I like the message, but the messenger rubs me the wrong way. It also seems that the Ts I had who were really personable and likeable were the least effective. Even though I could be more trusting and open with them, they felt more like friendships than professional relationships.
On the other hand, I put up with enormous emotional abuse during my 18 years of my first marriage, during which I learned the avoidance technique, shutting myself down (with drinking) so I wouldn't feel any of it. Now that I'm (newly) sober, all my feelings are raw and painfully present. Maybe that is what I am really experiencing, and this T is not as bad as I'm *feeling* she is. Like I misinterpret peoples' intentions and think that I'm being disrespected or treated shoddily when I'm not really being thought of in anything but a neutral way.
I guess I am hoping that by putting my personal prejudices aside that maybe I can go even farther with this therapist. Some of my greatest teachers at school were the ones who challenged me without much coddling. When I was young I was more resilient and could take these life lessons in my stride. Now I feel so much more frail.
poster:ClearSkies
thread:565597
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20051008/msgs/565806.html