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Re: I had to cancel my session this morning :( » Dinah

Posted by All Done on July 24, 2005, at 0:42:14

In reply to Re: I had to cancel my session this morning :( » All Done, posted by Dinah on July 23, 2005, at 11:12:51

> I'd be upset too. I've been known to inconvenience everyone including my son to make it to a therapy appt. I pretend it's because I'd have to pay anyway.
>
> I had a flat tire yesterday morning, but fortunately my husband had just left for work and we arranged to have me take his car and get to therapy. Even so I lost therapy time. Had I had to skip altogether, my mood would have been *even* worse than it was.
>
> Would it help to talk about feeling lonely with us?

Well, I guess I figure I already inconvenience N enough with my therapy. When my husband couldn't start his car, he came in the house and told me they weren't going to be able to go to swim class. I was the one who told him to take my car. Later, too, he told me he was sorry I had to miss my session. I think he gets it a little.

Hmm, I think I'm going to have to ask my T about any charges for missing sessions. I've never had to cancel at the last minute before. I have rescheduled a few days before, though. He's never mentioned me paying for a missed session.

Sorry about your flat tire. I'm glad you didn't have to miss your session, but it still stinks that you lost any time.

I guess I'm a little resistant to talk about feeling lonely here, because I think part of what I do and feel affects some of my relationships here, too. That said, I know you guys would probably have good insight for me.

Mostly this line of thinking stemmed from the fact that I haven't heard from a lot of my face to face friends lately. I know everyone is busy over the summer, but I still got to thinking about it.

I wonder if I tend to overwhelm my friends. Or, if I'm not overwhelming them, I worry about overwhelming them. I think sometimes I'm just too much for them and I don't ever want to bug anyone with my stuff. So, I try really hard not to talk about myself "too much" (whatever that is) and I try not to ask for much. I think I do this with my husband, my T, and probably some of you guys, as well.

Since I work so hard at not imposing on others, sometimes I have little contact with my friends. Or...maybe not the contact I really need or want. Maybe when I don't call them it's kind of an out of [sight], out of mind thing or something. Or, maybe they can't read my mind - can you believe that?? I end up feeling lonely and kind of like they don't care much or even like me sometimes.

I don't know. It's all a bit confusing to me because I also catch myself feeling like I'm "not enough" for these same people - not friendly/smart/funny/pretty (take your pick) enough.

To quote my T about something else we talked about last week...I don't think I can have it both ways.

Glad you asked? ;)


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poster:All Done thread:532059
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