Posted by jammerlich on July 12, 2005, at 17:44:13
I'm not sure if it makes any sense, but I think I have various levels of touch issues. On the most severe end, when I'm touched in certain places, there are flashbacks and ugly pictures. But I have issues with touch in general. I'm not fond of touching other people, but if someone has a need that can be met by my appropriate touch, then I can do it. I ache to be touched gently - I mean in a completely non-sexual way - but to receive it is emotionally overwhelming to the point that I fear it. How miserable is that? To be terrified of the thing you really want? I know it's not at all rational, but I believe I will contaminate people who touch me to meet my own needs (especially if they know about my past), and that people whom I touch to meet their needs will stay clean.
Ok, so on to my point..... Given all this, I have trouble with massages - well, spa treatments in general, really. I've only made it through one massage and I think it's because that particular one hurt. I'm sure part of it has to do with the touching, but I think the relaxation plays a role too. Like it's not safe to *let go* that much so I have to put a stop to it. But again, I want to so badly. Anyway, I'm going to be spending a long weekend at a fancy Four Seasons hotel with a spa that is supposed to be to die for and I want to try to use it. Have any of you who have issues with touch found some treatments you can tolerate or ways to get through them and enjoy them?
poster:jammerlich
thread:526822
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050706/msgs/526822.html