Posted by Tamar on July 6, 2005, at 17:06:12
In reply to Re: I know you all are going to blast me! » cricket, posted by Jazzed on July 6, 2005, at 13:23:48
((((Jazzy))))
I’m sorry you had such a hard time. And I do think it's rude to take phone calls in therapy, unless it's an emergency. Most things can wait half an hour; I'm sure someone could have taken a message for him.
I don’t want to knock him too much though. I’m just sorry he hurt you. I know you had your reasons for choosing to work with him, and maybe addressing this kind of stuff is some of the work you need to do.
I suspect that his CBT orientation may be one of the issues. They don’t always seem to encourage the attachment as much as psychodynamic therapists, as far as I can tell (but maybe I’ve got that wrong?). But you do need to be able to build some level of connection and trust.
> I don't feel that there's a connection yet. I know everyone is probably right. I am confused and feeling pretty stupid. I'm also hurt because of what happened. I think I need a good cry.
You aren’t stupid at all. You had your reasons for choosing him. You thought he could help you. And maybe he can. I reckon you’re probably a pretty good judge of character most of the time. Would you agree?
I think perhaps you may need to be fairly direct with him about your needs. Therapy with him might be less comforting and less gentle than with other therapists. But nevertheless he still might be the right therapist for you. At the very least, you can give him a piece of your mind at your next appointment.
What’s your gut instinct? Can you work through this with him? Or do you feel it’s absolutely inexcusable?
poster:Tamar
thread:524072
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050706/msgs/524348.html