Posted by Jazzed on June 13, 2005, at 8:34:23
In reply to Re: Transference Sucks, posted by Susan47 on June 12, 2005, at 14:42:13
I'm sorry Susan, sometimes you have to beat me over the head to get me to understand! I didn't mean to offend, I really didn't know if your feelings were feelings of love because when I fall in love I tend to get super anxious and try to fight that and be happy and fun. I know it manifests itself in all of us in different ways.I don't believe for one second that transference means a desire to have sex with your father. You're right, that's just icky, and anyone who would suggest that should have their head examined, I mean it just makes no sense whatsoever, conscious or unconscious. I do agree that we can transfer feelings for a lover, not neccessarily one we've ever had. This happened to me with someone, not a T, but the same kind of thing, another adult I couldn't have. I desired him, I wanted a fantasy, not an affair.
I agree, thinking that we appeal to another person on a sexual level feels great. Not just Ts, but any man we find attractive. For some reason that forbidden person (the T) is even more tempting because they're off limits, and if they were to develop feelings for us then that would feel really incredible and powerful. After all they're only human, who's to say that there's no way they will develop feelings. Acting on them and feeling them are completely different.
I know what you mean about needing to see a female. I should see a female T. I've chosen all female docs for other stuff, just so my feelings don't come into play. But, for therapy I want a man, I"m more comfortable with a man, I want to be helped and comforted by a man, and I know I'll fall in love if he's kind and caring, which is a pain because then I'll have to get over it eventually.
Good luck with finding someone.
Jazzed
poster:Jazzed
thread:511079
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050606/msgs/511955.html