Posted by whirlpool on May 2, 2005, at 13:25:00
In reply to question for psycho-babblers (possible trigger), posted by whirlpool on May 1, 2005, at 15:21:38
I am beginning to understand the difficulties you face and am glad that most of you have found what works for you in keeping the balance. It is so admirable how you all manage to function despite everything.
I guess there must be something strangely different about me. I have never been able to compartmentalize different parts of my life. During my school years I felt so overwhelmingly bad and wasn't really able to be aware of anything else around. Getting through each day was a struggle, and I didn't even notice that there was a world out there, that the other kids had friends, and that it wasn't normal to go through each day the way I did.
Now, even when medication is used to make things a little easier, it is just a coverup and the disturbing feelings are always there. Less overwhelming, but bothersome and inhibiting.
For some reason I have always felt that doing intensive regressive therapy would help, though what that would involve is unclear. What is clear is that there is no way I would be able to work or study during that period (not that I can't afford not to). As of now I am not doing either, and haven't been for several years. My fear is that telling my T, or any T for that matter , how I feel, will result in his mocking me and insisting that the important thing is to function in the "real world". I agree with that but have felt for many years that something really needs to be worked through which can't be done in the usual framework.
This is so embarrassing to me and for some reason it is impossible to tell anyone how I feel, or even to reply when asked frequently why I don't go back to school, for instance.
Does this all sound out of touch with reality? Maybe I am simply crazy...
poster:whirlpool
thread:492367
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050428/msgs/492700.html