Posted by shrinking violet on April 22, 2005, at 9:59:29
In reply to Re: physical holding (poss trigger) » sunny10, posted by happyflower on April 22, 2005, at 9:06:20
Hm, I'm torn down the middle, I think. I agree with Voce's concerns, and your question of "will this end in tears" did cause alarm.
My T holds me, but not in the way yours does. It's more like hugging, I guess, but for a few minutes at a time. My T is in a wheelchair, so if I'm upset she'll come over (usually she'll ask if she can, but sometimes she has on her own) and either I'll kneel down and embrace her and she'll rub my back and talk to me softly while I cry with her, or just let her hold me. At other times, she's come over and rubbed my back with one hand and caressed my face or hair with the other, or she'll just come over and hold my hand. It's hard for her to hug for long periods, b/c her back has been pretty much ruined :-(
I'd LOVE for her to do what your T does....And while I understand the need for it, and understand how it might affect you, I also see how it can be hurtful. My T is the only person in my life (parents/family included) who has been so openly affectionate and caring with me. And next week, I have to terminate with her, so....leaving that behind is going to be VERY hard, if not impossible.
Has your T ever told you why she holds you? Has she asked you, or just does it? Who initiates it? Is it every session? Does she do it with other clients? What would you do/feel if she suddenly stopped doing it?
I don't know...I'm a little worried for you.
poster:shrinking violet
thread:487743
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050420/msgs/487851.html