Posted by littleone on April 19, 2005, at 21:28:41
In reply to T gave a writing assignment, how do I hand it in?, posted by Poet on April 19, 2005, at 20:17:55
Okay, firstly, I'm not gonna laugh. This stuff is hard and I'm really proud of the way you've progressed in your therapy lately. Think I'll give you a double thumbs up instead. b d
> She responded to my I don't know with a writing assignment.
Oh, I hate it when they do that! "I don't know" is a big defence for me and I'm always spitting it out. Needless to say, I get a lot of writing assignments :(
> That is tough to do, but I have been writing.
Good good good!
> If your T has given you assignments or you keep a journal, do you read it to them, let them read it in front of you or hand it and run?
Normally I photocopy the journal pages and just hand him the copy. Even that was really tough for me early on, but has got a bit easier. Mind you, I still kind of freeze up when he asks for them and then bend down to my bag all kind of slow and creaky. I guess that means it's still tough.
I had holidays recently and didn't have access to the work photocopier and just wasn't organised enough to pay for photocopies somewhere. So I was having to actually hand him my journal and let him read it straight from there. That was really tough. He kind of respects my privacy and won't read other pages if I don't let him, but when he pushes I usually cave in and somehow he always ends up getting more than I intended.
Oh, and I have photos of him that I printed off the internet. They're just loose in the back of my journal, but I'm always careful so they don't slip out. But when he had my journal, they fell out and he talked about them and that was pretty humiliating. So if you have loose stuff, I'd recommend you take it out before your session.
Once I had some really terrible shameful stuff written out. I couldn't even bear to be there when he read it. So I *forgot* to give it to him until I was about to walk out the door. Even that was terribly hard. He read it between sessions and tried to raise it during our next session, but I was pretty closed off. I found it really hard between the sessions to tolerate knowing he had that information. Really drove me round the bend.
I never read my stuff out loud. And he doesn't really push that because he suspects that if I knew I *had* to read it out, I wouldn't write it in the first place.
Alex's idea of mailing is good. I've done this too. When I'm distant from my T, I can think clearer and realise that I do need to give him a particular write up. So then I mail it and I don't have to worry about changing my mind or trying to screw up the courage to do it while I'm in session with him. Although, the instant it leaves my fingers and starts to drop into the mailbox, I think "UGH UGH UGH UGH" and desperately try to catch it before it disappears.
poster:littleone
thread:486627
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050409/msgs/486678.html