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Re: I'm a bit of a mess :(

Posted by All Done on March 27, 2005, at 3:01:01

In reply to Re: We talked and talked and talked, posted by All Done on March 20, 2005, at 12:38:17

I'm very sorry, everyone. I wanted to respond to you individually earlier but there were a few things.

First, I started feeling like I wanted to defend my T and I didn't think that would end up being very productive.

Also, I wondered if I was upsetting myself about the situation somewhat unnecessarily. The ball is in his court and I can think about the result after he tells me what information he comes up with. I worry a lot and I guess this week wasn't a good week for me to spend too much time worrying where I didn't have to. My son was still sick and my aunt had a massive heart attack and was put on a ventilator. She was just taken off tonight and they don't think she'll live much longer. My cousin (her daughter) is a bit of a mess and so is my mom (her sister). Understandably so, but they are needing a lot of support from me. The whole situation is reminding me of when I lost my dad, though, and I don't know how much more I can do for them before I get way too sad. I'm already missing him a ton.

But I digress. I saw my T today and I don't think he's talked to the insurance company. We didn't talk any specifics about the issue. If he doesn't bring it up at the beginning of the next session, I will ask what he thinks his time frame is for looking into this.

It wasn't a great session. I didn't really realize until I left, but I feel like my connection to him has been sort of damaged. Hopefully, it's temporary and we can work things out. But until then, I'm left feeling uncomfortable and really, really anxious. It has to do with some other things too, not just the insurance issue, but that's definitely part of it. I don't like feeling so uncomfortable especially when I was just starting to feel more attached to him. It all has me so uptight and nervous I almost called him tonight and I never call. I feel like I'm losing him and that feeling always makes me panicky.

I'm sorry guys. I'm feeling pretty lousy, but I wanted to let you know I *do* appreciate your responses and I don't mean to be ignoring you.

You've been so sweet to me.

Thanks,
Laurie


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Psycho-Babble Psychology | Framed

poster:All Done thread:471253
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050315/msgs/476130.html