Posted by messadivoce on March 10, 2005, at 2:48:53
I've felt so down lately. Just sad for no particular reason. I wonder why...then I realized again that I lost my T not too long ago. So no wonder. And that horrible meeting I had, with that terrible, bitchy, soulless VP. She just didn't care. Am I allowed to hate her?? To hope she gets hit by a bus or eaten by ants??
You all said I'm so strong. I don't feel strong though. I feel broken, sad, abandoned. I just want my T back. I was talking to her on the phone a few weeks ago and I said, "I don't understand why this keeps happening." (Being left). She said, "It's certainly nothing you've done." But I don't believe that. Something must be wrong with me, if people keep leaving. I must have done something. What?? Will I pay for it the rest of my life??
My T has not answered her e-mail in a week, but I know she is assisting a friend who had sugery yesterday. I don't know when she'll reply. I miss her so much. And my old T too. Who I am certainly not over, not at all.
poster:messadivoce
thread:469111
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050305/msgs/469111.html