Posted by littleone on March 1, 2005, at 20:53:21
In reply to Needing comfort, posted by Shortelise on March 1, 2005, at 13:23:19
You and your T will click. Therapy's full of ups and downs and it sounds like you're in a down. But you've got so much history together, you won't just keep missing each other forever. It just takes perserverence.
> It's easy to apply the things I've learned in therapy here, to read what others write and be insightful - but inside my own mind, things are not so clear.
It's funny you say this, I was actually just thinking this exact thing earlier this morning. Falls had posted something saying I was smart (looking around, pointing at chest, who me?) and it was just like you wrote above.
Sometimes I can write things to think about to other people, but in my own mind, things are just so muddled and basically just too close to home. I was thinking maybe I should post an issue then reply to myself as though it was someone else's issue. Except, that would be like talking to yourself, only worse I think :)
> I feel so awful. Like something old and useless.
Aw, does it help to know that I think you're sweet and helpful?
> My knee jerk reaction is always always to think about suicide, though it is a thought, not an intention, no plans, and my T knows.
Someone else mentioned not long ago (and I'll probably get this a bit wrong) how once s appears on your list of options, it is never removed from your list. It will always be one possible solution to your problems. I think this is such a sad concept.
Hope things improve for you soon.
poster:littleone
thread:464935
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20050225/msgs/465196.html