Posted by Aphrodite on November 13, 2004, at 18:41:36
Why does this bother me? He's great about sharing, knowing that it helps me connect and trust him. I know a lot about his personal life and his personal struggles. Mainly he's been down much of my path before so I feel very understood and not at all judged.
However, the girlfriend distracts me. Over the year I've head the story of how they met, some things she is interested in, their living arrangement, etc. It's not an unusual thing; he often talks also about his friends and family members. He says it's unusual for him, but he trusts me. I will ask questions if it makes sense to, and he's always forthcoming. But even though I want to ask about the girlfriend like I do, say, his sister, I don't. I think it sounds like prying in that case.
I'll make a statement, and he'll say, "My significant other says that too." "So-and-so read the book you're talking about too." I just want to smack him.
Oh my heavens, please don't tell me this is uncovering some kind of erotic transference. No, no, no. I can't have that kind of problem now. Am I in denial?
I'm hoping it's because I'm talking about difficult relationship problems with my husband and how it relates to my csa. My take is that those pangs of jealousy relate to being jealous of their good relationship in general because they are clearly a solid couple.
Someone back me up here. Would this make you uncomfortable too? What's up with me? There's no way of telling him to quit talking about her without sounding spiteful.
poster:Aphrodite
thread:415589
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041113/msgs/415589.html