Posted by daisym on November 7, 2004, at 18:56:43
In reply to another interesting article, posted by Aphrodite on November 7, 2004, at 17:15:04
I liked the article though it was a little hard to wade through. I'm not sure what she means completely by impulsivity.
I'm coming to realize that perhaps I could understand myself better if I had acted out in a more traditional manner to csa...I haven't had trouble with relationships...I have several close friends, my children are all doing really well and I've been married for 21 years. I'll concede that the marriage isn't a happy one, and I tend to know a lot more about my friends than they do about me, but certainly I have the capacity for good business relationships, being a neighbor, etc. I haven't acted out sexually...I'm responsible...I finish what I start, I'm not too over-the-top about things being clean and organized, but I do manage to keep order, I have a successful career. I don't know. So many of these articles talk about people who have a life that's a mess...this isn't me. But I feel like a mess right now, and so unhappy. But there isn't any one thing to fix to make it all better. Which leaves me again to wonder, "what am I doing?" Am I looking to fix something that isn't broken? Do I want extraordinary when I should be content with ordinary?
Makes me thing of the Billy Joel song, "Oh these days of quiet desperation, as I wonder through the world in which I live." Maybe I should stop looking for fix myself and just accept that life is what it is.
poster:daisym
thread:412514
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20041104/msgs/413023.html