Posted by bell_75 on July 25, 2004, at 7:29:47
In reply to Re: those termination blues » bell_75, posted by Raindancer on July 25, 2004, at 6:51:25
> I feel for you so much. Would it help to have occasional contact with your T by letter? It might be that you need a little longer to terminate so that you might start to fill the time when you normally see your T with a new project or class to help the transition. Knowing you can go back if need be is helpful. People do go in and out of therapy as needed and it doesn't have to be a closed door. I think it's a bit like a toddler walking on her own after having been supported. It's scary at first and then the confidence grows as she walks further and further and feels her own power and autonomy.
>
> The crying is difficult to contain - perhaps you should let yourself cry and there will still be time to talk. Have endings been difficult for you in the past? You could talk to your T about this
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> You have obviously done well in therapy and should feel immensely proud of yourself - it's not an easy road. Posting here always helps, so please do. You will be in my thoughts. Please let us know how you're getting on. Take care.
>
> RaindancerThank you so much Raindancer. Its so warming to know people understand and you blow me away by your generous support and everyone here on PB.
>Have endings been difficult for you in the past?
Yes, one thing Ive noticed that ever since I was a little child I've always experienced seperation anxiety. Last year when i started out therapy I had a female T and she was quite lovely. We didnt form any strong relationship nor was i close to her but she left that clinic 7 weeks after we had started sessions and i cried in the final session i had with her. Also that session i met my current T so i was getting teary in front of both of them which was akward seeing as i had never met current T before. I feel a great sense of exposure and nakedness when im crying that im too vulnerable for my own liking which im sure most feel. Thats why i dont exactly welcome it with open arms. Maybe it would be different if the person in the room with me could put their arms around me and comfort me but i know that wont be happening here. It is an anxiety to have someone watch you cry yet patiently wait for you to be ready to talk because a million thoughts wrack my brain meanwhile. Its that nakedness and i cant look at my T while I cry because i want to pretend hes not there.
We've sort of talked about this and hes told me that its a positive thing to cry and that i should let myself as its natural and it would be more worisome if i didnt at times.Phew!
Thanks for listening. As I've typed this out I've actually raised some points which i think would be handy to also raise next session. I'll let you know how it goes if you'd like so.
Once again...thank you for your kindness.
Much love,
Bell
poster:bell_75
thread:370091
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040723/msgs/370219.html