Posted by bell_75 on May 26, 2004, at 2:11:07
In reply to Re: What's really depressing is...(some notes) » bell_75, posted by 64bowtie on May 25, 2004, at 15:49:47
"Please look up [affect] in the dictionary. To those not struggling with the distractions of multi-generational and multilayer dysfunction at the roots of their depression, the definition of the word [affect] can add clarity."
Affect:
1. To have an influence on or effect a change in.
2. To act on the emotions of; touch or move.
3. To attack or infect, as a disease: Rheumatic fever can affect the heart.
n. (Psychotherapy) The emotional complex associated with an idea or mental state. In hysteria, the affect is sometimes entirely dissociated, sometimes transferred to another than the original idea.Sometimes I see depression as not merely a collection of emotional feelings but just something that consumes my whole self from head to toe. Sort of like how a disease like HIV/AIDS affects every drop of blood and fluid in the human body, I see depression and mental illness in general as affecting the mental 'blood' of the mind and the entire person.
When I did breathing technique work for anxiety with my therapist we practiced taking a deep breath then breathing out a black cloud that comes from the tip of our toes to the top of our head as though to expell every drop of anxiety throughout the entire body. Depression works just like that in my opinion, a person becomes full of a range of emotion from a dull saddness to the lack of desire to live and the more severe it is the more it grows to fill the body and its limbs.
This is all of course my humble opinion, I have no formal training in psychotherapy and I purely state my opinions of mental illness from my own experiences."I honor my freedom and happiness. I counter with
the question, "If no-one can recover, why try?" "I'm so glad that you have that honour and can voice it. Hold onto that and take it with you through life because its special. You deserve this and more in life.
Although (like most things) I can be skeptical about trying for something which seems either so out of reach or isn't guaranteed (eg recovery) but at times I console myself with the saying:
"that which does not kill me only makes me stronger". From what I've experienced medication, therapy, speaking out about my mental illness to friends, family and babblers hasn't killed me. And isn't likely to either. And yes it has made me stronger. It hasn't been easy and no one told me it would be but therapy in particular has made me a stronger person. I continue to surprise myself everyday and see how much I have underestimated myself in the past.
So although I often voice concern to my therapist that I feel as though I'm going to be depressed for the rest of my life, I'm consoled by the fact that talking and doing lots of it is making me stronger. So in essence, I'm make steps towards my recovery when I don't even see it.
Also my T says "well no wonder you're depressed if you believe that" with a little grin on his face. Hearing someone else say "its highly unlikely that you will be depressed all your life" or at a rate that isn't managable is a relief. At times I cant be my own therapist and see the reality of having happiness in my life.
Heck, half the time I can't see the reality of life. Thats why its a great weapon of deffence to have someone on your side who either says what you dont want to hear or what you wouldn't normally say to yourself.We're all so used to hearing our thoughts we forget that there could possibly be other ones beside our own.
Thanks for your replies Rod :D <--you made me smile today, hooray! I love to smile I just sometimes forget how to.
-Michelle
poster:bell_75
thread:350170
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040522/msgs/350669.html