Posted by KindGirl on May 10, 2004, at 1:19:37
I am sorry I have been invisible here for a while...I had every string of that stupid virus on both of my computers and am FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY back online after over a week of this computer mess!!!!
Anyway....for anyone who wants to comment or share....I am finding that my mental illness is a very isolated and loneliness experience. The loneliness can be excruciating and cause such despair in me, especially since one of my "core issues" is being neglected and left alone to raise myself since the time I was a toddler. What I did to survive this was to become fiercely independent and a very high achiever. Kind of like a Shirley Temple kind of kid. You know, the kind of little snot that is a precocious pain in the a** who you want to shut up!!! Anyway....question...
1) Does anyone else here struggle with loneliness in recovery? How do you deal with it? (you come here, yes, but how else?)2) How do you all feel about the stigma associated with mental illness (or do you think there is none)?
I find myself to be on a deserted island inside. I feel like my t. is there, but even being with her is an island in itself because I am used to being alone and doing everything for myself and I want her to leave. She is bugging me because unlike every other nurturing figure in my life she won't leave and it is really beginning to bug me.
Secondly, I find myself lying to people about my mental illness. For instance, with my clients and work associates, I tell them I have a "meeting" on Thursdays and will be unavailable between certain hours, when I am really going to therapy. I also lie about my anti depressants...I tell people they are allergy pills or pills to help me sleep.
Does anyone else do this or has done this? It is just something I am noticing and wanted your thoughts.
poster:KindGirl
thread:345273
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040503/msgs/345273.html