Posted by milahra on March 28, 2004, at 21:19:24
Hi,
having now read a few of the posts here, I would like to start off from comments made elsewhere by Dinah (under 'Manic Defence and Therapy' in which she refers to OCD).
I'd like to know if, like my own dissociation, if OCD is at one end of a spectrum of obsessivness which starts perhaps with just being "finicky" about things.
For example, it hasn't happened in a very long time, but I remember a few times when I made a "game" to myself where I "had" to not stand on the cracks on the footpath. I remember it causing me some stress if I did stand on the cracks. Not a lot, but some. I was also aware that I had created the fear by my thoughts. That kind of fearful thinking served no healthy or useful purpose (except, *perhap* to act out some stress in me).
What *is* very obvious however, is my ongoing obsessiveness about wanting things in order. Not clean necessarily, just in order. I need my environment to be in order to help my *mind* be in order. It is true both ways: the more I am uncentred mentally, the more my housework etc goes down the drain. My life can get out of hand very quickly. For that reason, I regard my obsessive list-making and ordering a very practical thing (until I realize that the list-making has become an end in itself, which happens when I am most stressed).
I *like* sorting things - anything! It brings great ease of mind to have things to do that can be done one step at a time, so that it doesn't overwhelm you. When the house becomes untidy beyond recognition that it is harder to start again, but also more important for that.
I have *never* been said to have OCD, and neither do I identify with it to be honest. But I definitely *do* identify with being obsessive - anf I don't mind it!
Perhaps others here can identify with that - or not?
For now,
my best wishes to all!
milahra
poster:milahra
thread:329625
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040327/msgs/329625.html