Posted by crushedout on January 28, 2004, at 10:52:03
In reply to Re: Interesting book and a question about boundaries » crushedout, posted by lookdownfish on January 28, 2004, at 10:41:44
well, no, she didn't say anything was wrong with giving gifts. she just knew that by making me a mix cd she crossed a boundary. she didn't say it was inappropriate for *me* to make *her* a cd.
i don't really think of it as a gift so much, either, the one that i want to give to her now. it's more like, as i said, journal-writing. it's expressive of what's going on with me right now.
what do you mean by excessive? i have the same worry, but if i want to express myself, how can it be excessive? and why should i need an excuse? my "excuse" is that i want to share this with her. i didn't use christmas as an "excuse" -- it just happened to be around then. she's jewish, anyway.
sorry, i think i sound a little defensive. i really do want feedback. but i just feel a little defensive for some reason.
> sounds like you are doing really well with your transference issues, and your therapist is cool about it too.
> about the CD : when you had all the discussion about her giving you a CD and then regretting it, did she say that you shouldn't give each other gifts? Or was it just her giving you gifts that she decided was inappropriate? I would personally say she might think it is a bit too much... and there is not even the good excuse of Christmas. But I might be wrong. As an aside, I would never give my therapist anything, but she keeps very firm boundaries.
poster:crushedout
thread:306341
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20040123/msgs/306405.html