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Re: saving face

Posted by bookgurl99 on February 1, 2003, at 9:32:44

In reply to Strange Dream, posted by fuzzymind on January 5, 2003, at 8:06:18

>I remember during an evaluation 6 years earlier, the shrink told me that a possible reason my parents never got me any help was because of their culture. The ywere saving face by not letting anyone know they had a damaged kid.

Fuzzymind,

Are you asian? are your parents from an island?

i'm asking because my mom is puerto rican, so she's also from an island culture.

when i was growing up, the family could have really used psych. help. my mom was chronically sick, often close to death. but everything was swept under the rug in terms of feelings.

well, my younger sister has been studying island cultures. she learned that in island cultures, where people live closely to one another, the culture governs by shame. there is a strong need to 'save face,' to appear normal or better-than-normal at all times.

people from these cultures, i think, will not acknowledge any mental illness unless you actually can't function at all. everything else is explained away and swept under the rug.

i'm sorry that it took so long for you to get the help you needed. i sometimes wonder myself if i'd be healthier if i'd gotten the help i needed as a kid.

i'm glad you're getting help now. i hope things turn around for you.


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poster:bookgurl99 thread:2119
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/psycho/20021230/msgs/2418.html