Posted by susan C on November 4, 2002, at 11:52:19
In reply to Re: OK, I ended up reading the book, posted by Dinah on November 4, 2002, at 10:13:40
They were drawn to him by that heady and seductive combination of feeling understood and feeling accepted.
Is this not the essence of unconditional love? Of not being judged?
For not being "literate" You did a hell of a job Dinah. I almost cried a couple times reading your evaluation of the different characters. I did not get to the point of wondering about the deaf man with a radio...that one snuck by me. It seemed so natural when he brought it home. I guess, I too, was under the spell of Mr Singer.
I think in the end, even when he met the mutes, that sad exchange, or rather,lack of exchange, showed how important it was for Singer to give of him self, his own commitment in a relationship. When he did not take the risk, when he felt alienated, when he felt these people could not replace his friend, he felt hopeless.
Poor Mr Singer, he did not have the skills or perhaps the awareness to build a complex social network. He had a social network string of one. When it broke, so did he.
I have spent a lot of time thinking about this. I could not help but see a mirror to my life. I counted up my friends recently and was overwhelmed at how many people care about me. I asked one question: If something happened to me, where I needed help and advice, to whom would I turn? (no, I did not say "ghost-busters!!)
Not that long ago, I would have only listed one or two people. I was shocked. I was so shocked, I started to intentionally build friendships. It was hard, because, I have been very ill and very afraid. How could I be a friend to someone when I could hardly take care of myself? How could I rebuild friendships that had been lost to time, distance and misunderstanding?
I don't have the answers, but I think I have made progress, and it certainly has given me practice holding my tongue at times (slippery bugger).
Advancing Mouse
poster:susan C
thread:699
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/books/20020616/msgs/716.html