Posted by twinleaf on July 27, 2008, at 11:14:16
In reply to private communications, posted by gardenergirl on July 27, 2008, at 9:41:47
That's great. I think it's wonderful when meaningful, real-life friendships can develop out of an internet connection, as they have for you. They sound terrific! But not everyone has this as a goal. I have a lot of close friends IRL, and have seven god-children, so their mothers are in effect seven "best friends". It was important to me for prefessonal reasons to keep my actual life separate from my posting life. When Babble was at its best, several years ago, I found it a wonderful source of understanding, support and knowledge. It was a place where I could talk freely about the depression I developed when my mother died, and about the therapy I was embarking on. There were delightful, playful, affectionate moments mixed in with serious ones. I still think back on those times with a lot of joy and pleasure. They were helpful in therapy- and in life.
Two or three years ago, no-one would have tried to diagnose me with OCD, or some other "undiagnosed psychiatric disorder" because I called attention to a situation of excessive posting and it was somehow wrongly assumed that I was unable to stop reading the posts in question, rather than the true situation- that I felt it was causing the boards to appear less interesting and useful. I consider this a very destructive thing for one poster to write to another. Yet, no-one comments on it. No-one cares how hurtful it may be, . Remember, it happened to me this time, but it will happen again to other posters, when I'm no longer available to be on the receiving end of verbal abuse and insults.
To respond briefly to your other post about accepting and understanding the need a poster might have to post a great deal; yes, of course everyone tries to understand that, and wants to be flexible and accepting. there are always good reasons why people do such things, and social isolation and anxiety are undoubtedly important causative factors. We can certainly understand and accept that; but I'm also hopeful that the poster in question will self-monitor a bit. She has a lot to offer, and that will be much clearer if she posts just somewhat less.
poster:twinleaf
thread:841989
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20080719/msgs/842307.html