Posted by 64Bowtie on February 16, 2007, at 1:36:59
In reply to A civility question...., posted by Meri-Tuuli on February 14, 2007, at 3:35:31
IMO, central to your question is, "What about the lack of respect we are showing the recipient(s) of the in-civility???" IMO you are sharing feelings about the in-civility appearing equal in measure to a measured lack of respect for the recipients... Also, IMO, I share your concern...
In this light, I suggest that we take personal responsibility and refrain from these abstract in-civilities unless and until we are certain that we have a healthy dose of self-respect, and over a period of time, not just an aclamation or self-declaration...
Otherwise, how can we be sure of our motives and our intent??? Are'nt in-civilities sourced in griping, grumbling, complaining and gossipping???
IMO, YUP!!!
No matter how ruthlessly I assaulted those deserving my rath, griping/grumbling/complaining and gossip only hurt their feelings, thus never making a dent in their repulsive behavior... Eventually, this led me to question the wisdom of acting and speaking with in-civility...
When I was certain of myself and my healthy dose of self-respect, I no longer wasted my time 'hurting feelings'... I demanded responsibility and accountability in their altered and amended behaviors... The problems became solved, some sooner, some later...
Is'nt an in-civility a striking at others in order to inflict emotional pain by hurting their feelings???
Rod
poster:64Bowtie
thread:732656
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20070123/msgs/733222.html