Posted by gabbii on July 27, 2005, at 23:14:32
In reply to thanks for replying! More of my thoughts... » Dr. Bob, posted by JenStar on July 27, 2005, at 17:12:01
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> I kind of see certain posters as stone-throwers, as bullies. I wish we could stop them from being so disruptive. I guess I have patience up to a point, then I snap. What's the point, I think to myself, of hoping and wheedling and coaxing and sweet-talking a person who is just not listening?
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> It also drives me NUTS when other posters act all sweet and kind and understanding towards the 'mean' posters. What is THAT supposed to accomplish, I wonder to myself. Is it a way to try and ingratiate oneself with the bully, hoping to avoid future trauma? Is it a way to try and befriend the bully so as to be the important ONE who understands him/her? Is it a way to be shocking? Is it a way to be different? It is a fascination with power and abuse? --Of course, Dr. Bob, I don't expect you to answer these questions! They're questions I'm thinking "aloud" (atype?).
>Or gee, maybe they just like the person?
Nice is often defined by whose ox is being gored. Mental illness doesn't always present itself in ways that charm, perhaps some can relate to others better, and aren't as bothered by the things others find so offensive.
You can't label someone "Mean" or a Bully and expect everyone else to have the same opinion, and therefore having ulterior motives for being
conversatsional.
I have found lots of things to be mean and cruel that on the surface pass the civility guidelines, but that doesn't mean my feelings aren't valid. Does that mean I think that everyone else should take offense too? Hardly.
Or is it that someone offends lots of people, so somehow there's justification for expecting that they be ostracized by everyone?
Not in my world.
I've even felt harassed by off board e-mails, and people knew about it, I didn't expect everyone to suddenly ostracize the person.I can't understand why, if it's up to Dr. Bob whether or not the person is posting, why it would bother you who speaks to who? Your feelings are your own.
poster:gabbii
thread:531449
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/admin/20050716/msgs/534570.html