Posted by hyperfocus on April 1, 2011, at 20:39:22
In reply to Re: Autodestroying thougths ! how to stop them? help, posted by sigismund on March 27, 2011, at 22:09:51
> Tep, when you are young you are much more sociable than you are when you are older.
>
> This means that social phobia gets better with age, because when you get older you feel better about being alone. I know that sounds like no comfort at all, but that is how I have found it.
>Are you sure sigi? My mother said the same thing to me just recently when I was lamenting this hard-*ss recluse position I had taken (or was forced to take because of severe SP) when I was in my twenties. She felt certain that being by yourself and focusing on selfish things like your career was the best for anybody. But I'm not sure - if she does take up the guy in her apartment building on his offer of a drink, it will be a lot less comfortable than staying home and reading, but I'm not sure it wouldn't feel better.
Maybe it's just as you get older you become more patient and hopeful in general, like you become more comfortable waiting for the time when you won't be alone. I'm starting to believe giving and receiving love to other people is hardwired into our minds and bodies. A big part of the pain of my depression and social phobia is the feeling like I'm cut off from the rest of life - not abstract or scientific life - but real flesh-and-blood life.
poster:hyperfocus
thread:981290
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20110321/msgs/981681.html