Posted by 49er on October 27, 2010, at 8:21:13
In reply to my 2¢ on giving medical advice, posted by floatingbridge on October 27, 2010, at 1:47:50
> As I see it, a recurring irritant on PB is not simply disagreements in treatment approaches, but on the manner in which the supposed disagreeable advice is given.
>
> What if the PB civility's 'I' statements and mutual respect were applied to giving advice as well? (Whoa. I am not suggesting adding rules.) 'I have read/ heard this', or 'I have tried/experienced this' or just freely licensed intuition and creative thinking stated as such is so
> much easier for me to hear. In the case of disagreements regarding treatment, I am less likely to feel personal irritation or concern for another poster's welfare if
> they are given advice I disagree with.
>
> I dislike being told, when I am sick,
> depressed, anxious, and overwhelmed,
> (often all at once), that 'anyone with a
> brain could see that blah blah'. Or if I
> 'really wanted to get well,' I'd ______.
>
> In this light, I see habits of speech
> obscuring the intent of extending a helping hand to someone in distress, and this is what seems to be at the heart of most advice given here.
>
> To make it short, the pb civility
> requirement of 'I' statements which make self-ownership of feelings clear
> also supports mutual respect when applied to giving advice. Who knows
> what or how much from where is very important, yet secondary to admitting one's subjectivity in giving advice. Mutual respect shown through our posts
> supports self-authority, a wonderful quality to own and share with another person who finds themselves here.FB,
You have some good ideas but as one with a bad memory, I would worry about having to qualify every last thing I say.
I try to be respectful of people and make sure I carefully word what I say so it isn't offensive. But I have always have said that no matter how careful you are, someone is going to be offended. That is just the way it is.
Speaking of subjectivity, I don't think anyone who gives advice whether it is an amateur or professional is completely bias free. Again, that is just human nature
49er
poster:49er
thread:967106
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20101020/msgs/967117.html