Posted by bleauberry on April 9, 2009, at 5:48:30
In reply to 12 ECTs. Not working. Ready to get outta here., posted by uncouth on April 8, 2009, at 19:40:21
Alex,
I am here to let you know you aren't alone. I've been there, done that, with everything you are experiencing.
I did have a momentary response that lasted about 2 days following the 12th treatment. Then I was in an ambulance talking suicide again.
Memory loss for me was severe. I even had to print maps to drive places I have been hundreds of times. I vaguely recognized buildings in my small town, almost as if they were from some faint dream I once had. I wasn't sure where my street was.
Today the most pronounced longterm effect is memory loss of names. I forget people's names all the time. Lots of customers at my place of business come up to me and say hi, with my name, and I sort-of recognize their faces, but I have no idea who they are or what their names are. But they sure know me. Other people know me by name and I swear I can't recall ever seeing them in my life and wonder who they are. I politely chat with them as if I know them because they obviously know me.
I am now a negative critic of ECT. With deep study on the topic, it has become obvious to me that the hype of its effectiveness is way overblown. Actually, none of the 6 of us patients who were getting ECT at the same time improved. None. Zero. Some recent metastudies I have looked at show that on average the relapse rate for those who do respond approaches 85%, and that most of those relapses happen within 4 weeks of the last treatment.
My insurance paid most of it, but the total bill was $22,000.
The best thing for me after ECT was something you wouldn't expect...I weaned off all meds and went clean. Yeah, I'm still in bad shape, still at pbabble, and still searching. But ya know what, I'm better than I was on all the meds.
I keep trying new ones. I was amazed how the med Milnacipran (soon to be released in USA as Savella, for fibromyalgia) began working in 3 days better than anything I ever tried. It was amazing. Unable to pee though, had to stop. But the point is...things CAN work after ECT has failed. I think the most important thing to do is wipe the slate clean, wean off all meds slowly, and start from scratch. Continuing with meds that are not helping is ridiculous, counterproductive, and in my opinion prevents meds that might work from being able to work.
Hang in there. You aren't alone.
Nardil. Parnate. Add a Zyprexa or Abilify. Zoloft+Nortriptyline. Clomipramine. Any or all with Ritalin. Milnacipran. There is stuff to work. If you think you've tried everything, you haven't.
From a biological point of view, take a look in your mouth. If you see silver fillings, they gotta be replaced with white ones ASAP. That mercury is very likely a major player in your illness. The other thing to look at closely is Lyme disease. If you have ever had any exposure to a tick environment, whether you remember being bitten or not, take Doxycylcine for a few weeks (will help the inaccurate testing to be more accurate as it brings out the hiding organisms), get tested, and see a doctor who knows Lyme very well. Either one of the above two conditions will produce a depression that is extremely difficult to treat, because it isn't from a neurotransmitter fault, it is from poisoning of the nervous system.
My personal opinion is ECT will not work, and neither will any of the meds you now take. You gotta draw a plan and a strategy to wipe it all clean and start from scratch. I am not strong, so if I could do it, anyone can. My weaning period was long, about 3 months, very slow with very tiny drops in dose each step along the way. I did it very careful and that's why it took 3 months.
Just my opinion.
poster:bleauberry
thread:889549
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20090408/msgs/889596.html