Posted by yxibow on February 28, 2008, at 7:46:38
In reply to Re: When does anxiety become paranoia?, posted by AMY II on February 27, 2008, at 21:22:38
> I haven't been here in a while and I have been SUFFERING for 9 years now. I have mystified every medical doctor and neurologist I have seen. Even an eye doctor.
Eye doctor -- has your vision been psychiatrically changed ? I'm just curious because I have a very rare disorder.
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> Every time I went to see a psycologist, they wanted me to talk through what has been happenig to me (see my other posts since 1999 and you will see I need a little more than talk therapy!)
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> I am going to my 5th appointment with a Pdoc, first time keeping these appts. He already is going into "I need to revisit childhood issues".Psychotherapy does include knowing the past to view the present. That doesn't mean living in the past. I have troubles with that, that's different -- you live in the Here and Now. As for revisiting childhood issues, thats between you and your therapist -- I think the past teaches us about our present but we should be focused on goals that build "functionality", a bit of a clinical term I must say -- I don't particularly like it but it does have a meaning.
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> To recap, I have tried pretty much every SSRI or SNRI there is. Effexor worked the best for me but still had "weird feelings" in my head. Always had to have zanax handy. Have had weird neurological symptoms for the last nine years. I am being told that this "X" trip I did 9 years ago probably just brought out an underlying condition I have always had and made it worse. I get that. Fine.Well there is HPPD (Hallucinogen Persisting Perception Disorder) that doesn't normally respond to APs contrary to what one would think but Risperdal sometimes does work.
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> He wants to put me on Risperdal, Klonopin, and Clomipramine. I looked up the side effects of Risperdal and NO THANKS. Are you seriously telling me that is my alternative? End up getting TD for the rest of my life?First of all, yes, there is a possibility of TD. Risperdal is so far the only AP that has been proven to give TD at presumably certain long term high dose ranges. Low dose Risperdal may have opposite effects actually, although I'm not clear on this being completely true.
Secondly, there are APs with much less risk than Risperdal -- it is now (you can look at my previous postings) believed that conventional antipsychotics are 5% per year to an average possibility of a -lifetime- of 25%, while atypicals in their descending order of potency have shown some but few large order cases. The risk of TD for Seroquel for the average person I forget the previous posting but is somewhere between .1% and .5% per year. In serious anxiety disorders even low doses can have tremendous advantages where the benefits outweigh the risks.
Yes, I am extremely medication sensitive and I will disclose that I possibly developed some neurological conditions from high dose Seroquel use but this is highly unusual and non tardive from all the neurological examinations. It is a tic and is very psychologically motivated and random, which is not characteristic of TD or related conditions which can take years or a lifetime at high doses.
This is why the MED -- the minimum effective dose of a medication is used. .25mg of Risperdal is a very low dose, but you can of course express your adverse feelings towards it or suggest a less potent AP such as Seroquel, which doesn't really begin even to have major psychoactive roles above 100-200mg. Of course, as they say, your miles may vary.
In the short run -- and I am projecting, because I am choosing to continue to stay on Seroquel for the time being because it helps my functionality.
I reserve the option of taking Clozaril, but that is a future issue for reasons of medication clashes and all sorts of issues such as blood tests. Of course, it is the only AP proven not to have caused nearly any TD of any recorded amount. In fact, it is used to ameliorate TD.
He wants to give me .25 milligrams of it. It seems he just jumped to "an element of psycosis" right away. It kind of pisses me off.
Psychosis is quite different from the clinical definition of psychotic. There is also psychosis NOS (not otherwise specified/defined). There are perfectly functional people out there with as you say, elements of psychosis.
I can understand the immediate reaction to probably never hearing such a diagnosis especially so spontaneously. It sounds like a vast diagnosis of a schizophreniform illness. But that is not actually really always the case. You're always welcome to a second opinion of course.
> Because now, that is all I think about. Since last week when he said the word "psycosis". I have always said there is something more than anxiety going on and have always wanted a different diagnosis than just anxiety.This could be, as described below, and I'm not attempting to character assasinate, an obsessive view towards an off remark. But as humans, we do ruminate, I don't think there's anything wrong there.
> Funny and sad at the same time, I went through my old postings and somebody gave me a link to a book. Tormenting thoughts and Rituals. "Tormenting thoughts"??? Somebody else had this??? I bought the book immediately and realized I have OCD too!!!! I could have written some of the things in this book myself. All these years and NOBODY said OCD! Not one person. "Oh, you just have anxiety, it's acute..here is some zoloft, here is some effexor, here is some paxil, here is some cymbalta, here is some buspar, etc."
Yes, I can hear you there, I have comorbid Somatiform NOS, Psychosis NOS, and unspecified OCD (you never do get completely rid of OCD, you just try to manage it through life with both CBT and medication if needed and CBT can be very useful, if one is receptive -- the same goes for therapy, one has to be receptive and commitive to it to gain anything from it and I sometimes try to live in the past where this spontaneous disorder didn't exist, but as I said before, its the Here and Now)> Some of it is my fault because I couldn't manage to find a psyciatrist and stick with him. Yes that is right, all these years I just haven't done it. I have been so anti pdoc because of the whole "let's look into your childhood" thing.
Well, it takes a while to build a relationship with a psychiatrist and/or psychologist. Perhaps this isn't the right person for you. As for one of my therapists, it is really a mixture of what is right for the patient. The individual has to have a say in therapy, one doesn't sit on the couch and be therapised. You can always be critical of what was said -- of course there are always consequences, there may be a reparte, a discussion back. That is what therapy is about.> Somebody please help me. I feel so hopeless right now. I am not doing good. I see the Pdoc tomorrow.
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> PLEASE READ MY previous threads and somebody HELP!!!!
poster:yxibow
thread:811294
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20080221/msgs/815128.html