Posted by simon levane on February 6, 2006, at 9:35:28
In reply to Re: Suicide on Effexor, posted by Devastated Mother on February 5, 2006, at 9:46:01
Dear Still Devastated Mother,
Thank you for your kind thoughts and sharing of your own experience. You are so lucky to have other children, though I know this does not ease the pain, but at least it gives you reason to go on and your teaching of other children gives you that opportunity to make a difference in their lives. Unfortunately, my daughter did not have enough teachers who cared enough about her to help her. One mentor teacher could have made so much difference.. In elementary school she did have a wonderful librarian teacher who was able to motivate her, but at that time we did not see the long range risks.
Each of us can make so big a difference in the lives of others, but sometimes, so many just do not take that opportunity or do injury by their limitations.
They say "it takes a village to raise a child" and sadly in our case, we were just too isolated and alone.
again.. thanks for your comments...
I just received a request on the survivor advocate group in Canada from some health care specialists working on how to improve the whole issue of patient-doctor confidentiality in the case of patients at risk from suicide, involvement of families and proper sharing of relevant information. Perhaps there will be changes, but oh dear, in this modern age .. too late for my daughter.. too late for me..
Simon> "I feel as if she was "stolen" from us due to this completely flippant and care-me-not attitude of the doctors. My close friends tell me that she and I would have found one another again. We had shared a lot of joy and laughter together"
>
> This part of the comment you made was particularly meaningful to me, as it absolutely states exactly how I feel. I am sure your daughter would have grown into a wonderful young woman, as much as I am sure my son would have been a terrific adult, father, uncle, brother...
>
> On the other hand, every time I say the Lord's Prayer, I think of Al, a friend of ours who on his deathbed in his dying gift to his young children (I think they were 6 and 11), shared the meaning of this prayer. We are none of us promised long life, and the knowledge that our children shared unspeakable pain gives me hope that they were welcomed into His house with rejoicing. This alone sustains me and allows me to continue living, else I would have to die, taking the good doc with me. I am also blessed to be a teacher and I minister to His other children every day of my life, and will continue to do so for as long as He sees fit to leave me on this good earth. The teens of all sorts that I watch every year grow and change into adults are the reason I know that yours and mine could have become comfortable adults, given the chance.
>
> My daughter, at his funeral, asked during the service if she could sing for her brother (we had not planned this as part of the service). She said she didn't mean in church, but by the grave. I told her to just bring a song book and it would be fine, and asked what she wanted to sing. Together she and I sang "You are Mine". Nothing in my life has touched me more, and it gives me peace today knowing that for that brief time, she and I together recognized God's power over us all.
>
> So, does this help? At times...at times all of it does. And at times nothing does. At times screaming and tearing my hair out would help.
>
> Still devastated mother....
poster:simon levane
thread:601406
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20060205/msgs/606850.html