Posted by jonh kimble on September 7, 2005, at 19:17:04
Hi all, its been a while. K, I have a docs appt. tomorow and I was just going to go in and discuss the clonazepam Im taking, and how we'll probably taper off since Im at 3mgs and dont want to go higher, etc..... BUT! I remember and am thinking about trying nardil again. Quickly, heres why.
Ive had what I believe to be apd, my doc calls it social phobia, and we both agree group cbt is a good way to go and Im totally on board with this, but I have been doing 1on1 therapy for 1 1/2 years now and I really havent improved even a smdge over all this time. True, I dont do the exposures as frequently as must be done, but I have for say 2 weeks at a time and any hint of failure shatters my confidence, so I naturally dont continue and without (at least the feeling of) being able to explain this to my therapist try to explain without it making sense to them and then have to lie...
So therapy isnt going to work in this given sit., Im developing a tolerance to the clono. and Ive tried maybe 20-30 drugs with very limited response, incl. Nardil. Not a hopeful situation BUT...
Maybe 3 years ago when I first tried clono. 1mg I said and it did nothing! Didnt even feel like I had had a drink. No tolerance whatsoever. Few years later by chance im given it again and I notice a small effect, take it again remembering what it did and wow! was it effective, not that anything biological happened, I simply changed my expactations, first time expecting to feel comfortable running down the street naked, essentially anti-anxiety effect of 15 drinks while being sober. Also thought this is simply a matter of brain chem. and HAVE to take a pill, only option. In light of clono. working fairly well with new expectations and some thought modification, Im wondering if Nardil could help me, maybe even quite a bit.
C before I took a max of 60mgs for about 2 weeks and not getting blown away by some miracle I tossed it right then and there. I think 1) way to low a dose 2) way to short a trial and most importantly 3) even without 1 and 2, I wouldnt have noticed anything anyway because it would have had to turn me into a social butterfly. How could it have worked? Given its incredible ratings for sp and that general spectrum of disorders, I think its time to do a good 2 - 3 months on 90 or more mgs in conjunction with the gcbt starting in a few weeks.
What are all your thoughts?
My main probs. are severe distress in one on one interaction (interaction in general but this is most dehabilitating), supreme fear of rejection and sensitivity to it, I avoid almost all social interaction even with family because if someone rejects me even mildly, no kidding I take worse than if I lost thousands of dollars, broke a bone, well anything rationally bad. I also obsess about tons of with, worry alot about tons of things, etc...I have noticed that small doses of lsd are the best for my condition as I open up, follw thoughts much more clearly, feel extactic about life, and approach people in a totally rational manner. I Also know that it is a very serotonin based drug, and bezoes and alcihol work well but in a totally differnt way through there effects on gaba. Doesnt Nardil mainly work on these 2 neurotransmitters? Is there any reason to drawing a connection here? And finally, I know my doc. is very liberal and open to these ideas but hes going to need a good schpeel on my part tomorow as it took with getting clono. a year ago. Its not addictive, not very likey to develop tolerance, Im going to do therapy simutaneously, Im very responsible, I now the precise interactions, was on before with no probs. are all good but this is life or death, any other suggestions about this or anything Id appreciate immensly. Articles on it or whatever Id love.Thank you, Tom
poster:jonh kimble
thread:552000
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050901/msgs/552000.html