Posted by 4WD on July 2, 2005, at 21:56:04
In reply to Re: Trileptal is pooping-out on me., posted by linkadge on July 2, 2005, at 18:39:03
> The fact is, that nothing gets done. I can barely start the sentence "I wonder if we could try a combination I've been thinking of...." before the subject is changed to how I should be spending more time with friends.
>
> The doctor *repeately* tries to reinstate the notion, that *he* is in controll, and *he* makes the decisions.
>
>
> LinkadgeAll the more reason to switch. He's so caught up in his ego he's not going to cede any power to you. God forbid that your ideas work out where his haven't.
That said, I wonder what would happen if instead of saying "I wonder if we could try..." you said: "I want to do a trial of xxx. I believe that will work for me." Then he says "you should spend more time with friends." Then you say, "yes, that's a very good idea but I also want to try a trial of xxx." Don't approach him as a supplicant. Go in and tell him what you want. You are paying him! He is working for you.
Of course, you still may not get anywhere if he's as big an ahole as some I've met. But sometimes bullies (and that's what he sounds like) respond differently if you approach them from a position of strength. I know that's hard to do when you feel like your life is in his hands. And there's the tendence to approach it sideways instead of directly because you figure that asking directly for what you want will result in outright denial. But asking sideways isn't getting you anywhere so what have you got to lose?
Marsha
poster:4WD
thread:520955
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050702/msgs/522715.html