Posted by Zanzibar_inJanuary on June 2, 2005, at 23:11:48
In reply to fear of insanity, posted by Rjlockhart98 on May 27, 2005, at 17:54:50
I know it can probably only be described in metaphore, but can you tell me more about what you mean by "...there is muffle around my mouth and I cant talk and feel locked inside..." ?
I think I know what your talking about; sometimes I feel like I can't talk because my tongue feels really big, and its like theres a paralysis around my mouth. If i try really hard I can talk, but its usually nonsense that comes out because I'm so confused and scared by what i feel.
Is that simmilar to what you mean?
Also, when this happens, each moment is SO LONG, like, I feel like I'm veiwing the world in frames...i feel like i'm going to get stuck in one of the frames and that time will just STop. and i'll be stuck that way, confused and scared and insane forever.
its impossible to explaine how this feels to people. my body literally looks and feels like it doubled in size; i really DO see things in frames, and it goes so terrifyingly slow.
sometimes i come out of these trances with pulled muscles and sore joints because i dont feel whats "uncomfortable", i positional myself akwardly.what scares ME most is how TIME can suddenly be so subjective. my friend told me one time i kept saying "i feel like i'm 30 seconds behind right now". i had my hands covering my face and was saying "i cant see!" . at the time i didnt even know it was because i was hiding my face in my hands- i thought i was blind.
does the lorazapam help? i dont even know if it helps me- it definitly makes the experience less terrfying, but doesnt make the sensory distortions feel less real.
i'm afraid of insanity too. i think whats most important is to always try to keep aa sense of perspective when you start having these feelings- remember that they always stop. its the only thing that helps me. i close my eyes and curl up and try not to think, or, repeat reassurances to myself in my head that it will all be over, i just have to wait it out. but its still terrifying.
theres no way this is just anxiety.
poster:Zanzibar_inJanuary
thread:503820
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050601/msgs/507188.html