Posted by maxime on March 18, 2005, at 19:59:06
In reply to Re: I can't hold out much longer » Maxime, posted by CareBear04 on March 18, 2005, at 17:08:35
Thank you CB. You are so sweet. DBS is deep brain stimulation ... a pacemaker for the brain. They are doing trial studies in Toronto and I am trying to get on it.
This is this deepest depression I have been in.
Maxime
> maxime dear-- i'm so sorry you feel so bad. i've definitely been in dark places where i feel like that and where it feels like i'm shouting, like i'm drowning, and like no one will act. i must've missed your other posts because i don't know what DBS is, but i'm crossing my fingers for you that it will come through.
>
> you're right that life isn't fair. i used to look around at everyone else and see that most of them are blindly content; they don't spend hours each day wondering as to the meaning or purpose of life and their own meaningfulness. while my friends led normal college lives, i lost time and credits and positions and had my identity and reputation defined by my illness. maybe just because i'm in a better place at the moment, i can say that life's not fair, but the playing field does level some. i don't know if you've been in black holes like this before, but if you have, you know that you've survived and dug your way out and are stronger because of it, regardless of where you're at now. because you've experienced a lot, you have a lot to give. i know that doesn't help right now, but i'm sending you lots of good thoughts and know that you're strong and can make it through this. you're worth all the treatment you can get and more, so don't stop reaching out for it! you're in my thoughts... *hugs*
> cb
poster:maxime
thread:472245
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050317/msgs/472627.html