Posted by olysi79 on February 1, 2005, at 14:08:43
In reply to SO suicidal, posted by linkadge on January 28, 2005, at 18:59:08
Linkadge,
I understand. I am worried abotu you. I know that this will pass, I am sure it will and hopeful it will. When you feel this way, you have to tell yourself,e ven if you don't believe it,that you will be ok. This will take time and pain, but eventually you will be ok. Definetely find another doctor and try some of the suggestions the other folks have said. Perhaps keep a class to keep yourself going and drop the rest, and if that is too much, then take a semester off. You ahve a right to feel good, and it will happen in time.
Best,
Chris> I just can't explain the symptoms I am having.
>
> Every second I am alive I want to kill myself.
>
> It just never ends. Never, nomatter what I try to do.
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> I am so messed up. No doctor can help. Nothing works. I am more hopless than I have ever been.
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> I think I have had a stroke. I think I have had a seizure.
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> It is just a matter of time. I am just waiting for the right time.
>
> My arms legs and face is tingling. I can't read a sentence. I am in hell, and it just won't end.
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> There is no point to being alive.
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>
> The psychiatrist I was about to see posponed my appointment for another month.
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> No docotor cares. All the doctors leave it up to me, but no doctor seems to understand that I can't do it.
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> I have a horrible sinking feeling all day long. There is a lump in my throat all day long.
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> I can't sleep, and I don't eat.
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> My face looks like a skeleton. I have lost many pounds. Muscles in my arms legs, and face twich all day long.
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> I am cold, and in pain. I weep bitterly untill my nose bleeds and my eyes burn. It still doesn't stop. I feel like somebody is pusing me. Sometimes my head turns to the side and it gets stuck like that an I can't move it for hours.
>
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> My vision periodically goes black and sometimes red. I don't know who I am.
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> I have trouble swallowing. My hands and feet are cold all day long. I have chest pains, and diareah every day.
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> I fear everthing.
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> I just want to die. Every day it gets worse.
> I cannot blink my eyes properly for some reason.
>
> Why does nobody want to help me? Why does no docotor say, I will see you as often as you need till you get better ? Why do the docotors see me for 5 minautes and send me away? Is this all there is? Why does the hospital leave me lying there all day? Why does going to the hopsital make me more hopless?
>
> There is no point to even be posting here. Words can only help so much. I am only 21, and God hates me so much. He won't lift a finger to help. Not a single finger. Why does he not care for me?
> What have I done wrong. Why can't I just die.
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>
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> Linkadge
>
poster:olysi79
thread:449369
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20050128/msgs/451074.html