Posted by Larry Hoover on May 29, 2003, at 9:54:51
In reply to Better living through chemistry (DOW's maxim), posted by Squiggles on May 29, 2003, at 9:10:02
> Hi,
>
> I am of two minds on the treatment of mental
> illness for many reasons i have given here
> before - some having to do with the controversies
> on the net, others ideological, and others personal
> uncertainties and doubts.Uhhh, that would be three minds....<just teasing>
> I am tilting towards the "hard-core" medical
> treatment side though, after seeing the great
> results of Remeron on my friend's mental and
> emotional health. The improvement is so great
> that i am heartened to see chemistry alleviate
> human sufferring. I just wish it was chosen from
> the beginning of the dx, some 20 yrs. ago.Blind luck.
> Better late than never.I'm very happy for the success.
> I am not so sure of my own dx, and have often
> wondered if it was not Valium w/d. My SO says
> no way - any outside observer could tell something
> was seriously wrong.....including your treating physicians. Doctors are ethically bound to only medicate if there is a perceived need.
> Anyway, my problem has been mostly that my
> parents have put me in conflict with my doctor,
> always putting my doctor down and denying that
> there is anything wrong with me.Family dynamics in multi-generational mental illness are very complicated. First, you got your genes from somewhere, non? Second, your parents are the product of another generation, an entirely different social climate. Mental illness was suppressed, denied. They want you to do what they did. They have a vested interest in maintaining their denial.
Contrast the perceptions of your spouse and doctors with that of your parents. Which more closely matches your own perceptions? (You've been taking medication for twenty years for reasons, I suspect, other than blind obedience to medical authority.)
> To add to this
> stress, i feel that i am expected to play the
> role of a perfectly socially capable and ambitious
> "winner". I know i am perceived as a loser.So, why do you accept this expectation, and this perception?
> There are also historical problems which i can
> no longer cope with -- as just the memory makes
> me sick with stress. I just want to crawl into
> a hole and hide.Yesterday is history. That's a decision, too, to dwell on unchangeable experiences.
> This puts a lot stress on me - i can't handle it.
> Sometimes it makes my head feel really funny from
> the stress.
>
> Should i discuss this somewhere else or, does anyone
> have this problem - the denial and the attempt
> to live up to that denial?You can't do anything about other people's denial, but there is no reason to make any effort to accomodate it in your own life. Accept your parents for who they are, but find comfort in your own knowledge about yourself.
> Thanks.
>
> SquigglesI'm sure this will get redirected to social-babble, but hey, while it was here.....
Lar
poster:Larry Hoover
thread:229912
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20030525/msgs/229918.html