Posted by BarbaraCat on October 22, 2002, at 2:00:43
In reply to Re: Remeron - adios. Lamictal hello, posted by McPac on October 21, 2002, at 22:06:49
Mixed states is a term particular to bipolar whereby there isn't much of a typical continuum of depression/mania/depression. It's more like depression and mania collide and it's very very nasty. It's like being stuck in an Edgar Allen Poe story or maybe a Stephen King horror. Very nightmarish, bleak, anguish, cataclysmic doom and dread.
I've been 'depressed' as well and know that state well, whereby one can't get out of bed, or motivate, or care about anything and everything is dreary and flat. Mixed states is different, it verges on psychosis with extreme hypersensitivity and heightened awareness of suffering. I can barely take a walk outside without getting assaulted with vibrations of violence and pain. You can imagine what hearing the news does (I NEVER read the newspaper or watch TV news). Probably Vincent Van Gogh with his swirling black skies and black jagged outlines is what my world looks like in this state. Thank God it's not an always thing, but happens too often for my liking.
Lamictal doesn't calm me as such, but allows things to regain perspective, like letting the light in instead of only the dark. I still need lorezapam because my poor nervous system is fried. But for the first time today I was able to think about the lobster tank at the supermarket without losing it. The next step will be to walk past the tank without falling apart and sobbing in the aisle. I kid you not, I've done this too many times and for Pete's sake, I KNOW I can't save all the lobsters of the world.
> BarbCat "My particular demon seems to be bipolar mixed states depression"
>
> >>>>>>>Barbara, what do you mean by "mixed states depression"?
> Also, does Lamictal 'calm' your nerves?
> Thanks!
>
>
poster:BarbaraCat
thread:31636
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20021019/msgs/124635.html