Posted by MB on September 10, 2001, at 21:54:38
In reply to Re: Valerian Safety » MB, posted by kid47 on September 10, 2001, at 15:44:17
Hey, thanks for the encouraging words. I've taken SSRIs before with limited success, they make my anxiety and racing thoughts too much handle. Then they just kinda poop out and don't do much other than make me tired all the time. I think they're the wrong type of medicine for me. The valerian takes the edge off of the panic and anxiety, but it seems to be losing its effectiveness and giving me a headache and stomach ache. I think that the extreme anxiety is driving me nuts ("psychotic episode," I think, is the proper term). It just gets more and more intense to the point that I can't take it. My thoughts get weird. I mean the panic gets so bad and the guilt gets so overwhelming, everything *feels* evil...then I snap and freak out and think there really *is* something evil in the house with me. Then there's the unexpected periods of bliss that, when I'm having them, I can only explain as being some type of spiritual experience. I don't think having a buddha-like awakening is psychotic, but I think it takes a life time of meditation. When I'm suicidal and panicking one minute, and then feeling blissed out and one with the universe the next minute, I think that needs to be chalked up to a brain problem. I read some of the stuff I wrote over the past few days and it's pretty scary. I'm scared to tell a doc because I don't want to be put on a neuroleptic (the times I've tried them to augment ADs, they've knocked me out cold and left me feeling like crud). I hope something like what I'm experiencing could be helped with a mood stabalizer. Anyway, I've been calling p-docs and haven't been getting call-backs. Phoey!
Anyway, probably time to cut out the valerian.
Did you give up caffeine cold-turkey? The depression is too much when I try that. Today I've had two cups of green tea instead of coffee. The first one sent me into a crazy mixed state type experience, but the second one didn't seem to. I don't know. I just hope I can get to see a doctor before I become irrevokably psychotic or before I pick up alcohol again! Schizophrenia, bipolar disorder and alcoholism all run in my family. Wouldn't that be lame if i had all three? Sheesh. Well, I think the fact that I'm having moments of clarity might be a good sign...i dunno...
> Hi. Congratulations on your involment In AA & your recovery. I have known some AA folks who do seem to be very closed minded on the topic of psychmeds. My standard answer would be " if you were a diabetic & your body needed insulin because of a chemical imbalance you would most likely take it". The same can be said for mood disorders. You were probably self medicating for a long while before AA. Now you have the opportunity to take a prescription medication, but unlike the Alcohol/drugs you were using to self medicate,
> it could very well improve the quality of your life. You said you had been on meds before. Did they help?
> I too took Valerian Root & found it to be a great sleep aid, but after a whle it really seemed to exacerbate my depression. I would exercise caution using it. Sounds to me like you are having some mood cycling maybe with some psychotic features. Untreated or undertreated depression & or anxiety can cause a pyschotic type episode. There are AD's & mood stabilizers etc. available to successfully treat your problems. Please don't let the guilt-trip approach of your AA sponsor disuade you from seeking pharmacological help for your ilness. Mental illness is NOT a character defect anymore than cancer or arthritis. Find a good pdoc & the correct meds for you & start feeling better. Good luck Take care
> kid
>
> PS-I pretty much had to give up caffeine. It really made me anxious.
poster:MB
thread:78477
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010907/msgs/78541.html