Posted by Shaun on August 16, 2001, at 11:25:33
In reply to Re: aha! Deja Vu, posted by Zo on June 28, 2001, at 2:04:54
I can identify with this, Lawrence.
"I'll try. This is difficult to put into words. And I've been trying to forget these horible feelings. When I get these episodes It feels as if I'm slipping into a coma. But I've never been in one. I don't know why I choose that word. And it's like half of my brain is awake and the other half is sleeping. Fragments of dreams come out of the blue. but there all jumbled together like a radio thats pulling in several stations at once with a lot of static mixed in.
The deja-vu is so intense that time doesn't seem to exist and reality is like a skipping record that has been skipping for eternity.
These symptoms began when I started taking Halcion (bezodiazepine sleeping pill). Which I only took for 3weeks.
A.Ds and Klonopin have almost eliminated these bizarre experiences."My experience came only once, lasted 3 hours, and has plagued me with awe, wonder and fear for the past 9 years.
I likened it to a mystical out of body experience. I came across Nietzsche and his theory of Eternal Recurrence of the Same, which insists the life we're living has been lived an infinite number of times and will be lived an infinite number more times.
Think of life's events like moves on a chess board or an outcome to a poker game. There are a finite number of possibilities, and over the course of time, all of the games will be played, and once they are, games will be repeated.
My experience ripped my mind open. I got caught in a time loop. You called it a coma. I call it an out of body experience. I watched from a detached viewpoint as my body and part of my mind was whirled through this 7 second glitch in time. I saw the same series of events repeat themselves over and over again. As I was analyzing it from the detached viewpoint, I felt as if I had been analyzing this moment for all of eternity, and that I would continue analyzing it for all eternity. Suicide popped into my mind as an unchoosable choice because there would be no escape from the repeat even in death because the loop was infinite and eternal.
I kind of came to terms with it after reading up on Allan Watts' Eastern Philosophy teachings. I think these moments are more visionary than anything else. As it was happening, I thought that I had gone crazy, or that I had died, but looking back on it, I that somehow my sensory intake filters got disabled and I was given an adulterated peek at the way life really works. If I'm crazy, I think the way we define craziness and psychosis need to be reworked.
I've been putting together research about deja vu, mystic experience and its relation to religion and physics. If anyone would like to discuss this with me, I would be delighted and honored. Email me. hogrot@hotmail.com
poster:Shaun
thread:67040
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010814/msgs/75280.html