Posted by susan C on August 11, 2001, at 17:45:29
In reply to Help ! Rocky patch ..., posted by sweetmarie on August 11, 2001, at 10:48:46
Hi again,
I wander around of this board and the social section occasionally and came across this and immediately thought of you. I didn't see if you had responded, so don't know if you read it, but it is one I want to save and re-read for times I have feelings like you are having now. Hope a dose of philosphy is helpful
Ta Ta,
-s
http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/social/20010731/msgs/8663.html >hi
>
> I`ve just got back home after being discharged from hospital, where I`ve been for 4 months now.
>
> I was started on Mirtazapine/Venlafaxine/Lamotragine after 3 weeks in hospital. So, in total, I`ve been on this combination for 13 weeks. However, I`ve only been on `top dose` Venlafaxine (375 mg - as high as my consultant wants to take it) for 8 weeks. Over the time that I`ve been in hospital, my mood has been gradually improving from rock bottom (what I describe as `0 out of 10`) to better than that - i.e. about 3 out of 10 average (I find it easier to `log` my mood in numerical terms). Last w/end was a bit of a `breakthrough`, I felt, and I actually woke up 2 days in a row feeling O.K. as opposed to totally cruddy and wanting to stay in bed all day.
>
> However, this past week has been very difficult, and my mood has been very low. Today is hideous.
>
> There`s lots going on for me, though, not least leaving the `safety` of hospital, where I was being monitored and talked to on a regular basis (the nurse/patient contact is quite intense there). Obviously, I`ve left behind friends that I have made over the past months.
>
> Also, I now have the prospect of going back to living alone again - I`ve been staying at my parents` place on my `home leaves`. I am also aware that I need to motivate myself to do things now - I won`t have nurses/doctors/parents to do this for me. If I don`t keep up some kind of activity/social contact, I am more likely to find myself `back` where I was. My flat is where I was when my illness was at it`s worst, and I associate it with those times. To be quite honest, I`m feeling VERY scared and anxious about the whole thing.
>
> So, I`m facing `the rest of my life`, if you see what I mean. Nightmare.
>
> Could this be the reason behind my drop in mood? I felt that I was actually getting somewhere prior to this last week.
>
> I was told by the consultant treating me that some people experience a `sudden` lift in mood, whereas others experience a more gradual shift (especially where the illness has been severe and protracted). I know from experience that medication can take quite a while to `work` fully, and would be reluctant to alter things just now. My consultant feels the same way.
>
> So, I suppose that I`m after some reassurance ...
>
> ... if anyone can help me out here I`d be most grateful. I`m experiencing a *real* loss of faith, and feel totally discouraged.
>
> Please help if you can.
>
> Thanks,
>
> Anna.
poster:susan C
thread:74612
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010809/msgs/74662.html