Posted by Elizabeth on July 9, 2001, at 21:45:18
In reply to Re: I'll hold your hand if you'll hold mine » Elizabeth, posted by Lorraine on July 8, 2001, at 22:04:27
> This is good to know. I thought it might have been intentional. What can I say? Depression talks and I listen.
Low self-esteem, you mean (in particular)? Don't listen to it too closely.
> I will be interested in your progress because desipramine is my next stop. What happens when you throw in the towel?
Despite having tried a lot of things, I'm a long way from throwing in the towel.
[re Effexor]
> It made me feel like I finally "got" something that had elluded me. It's better to be without anger generally--you still need to confront people and so on but you are not angry and that does not get in the way as it is prone to do.I agree, actually. Confrontation is much more effective when not accompanied by emotional outbursts.
> Oh yeah, this is also true, but the question becomes when does a trait rise to the level of requiring medication? When it annoys me? :-)
"You know it when you see it." (Attributed to various people as a legal definition for "pornography.")
> Yes. I am more punctual now. I "get" it. I fully realize now how anger gets in the way of communicating.
Some people have a really hard time getting that. The way they describe it to me (and I feel this way about some things, too) is that there must be a manual for "how to be a human being" that everybody else got but they didn't. For others, it's something they learn as they mature, and for a few lucky ones, it just comes naturally.
> But, since I am no longer on Effexor, I blow my top occassionally and unfortunately give people a bit more than their share of my temper when I blow. Which means I have to apologize (don't you hate that? especially if you were right, but blew it on the delivery?)
Heh. That does suck, but I try to take it in stride. I'm not so big on the right-wrong/win-lose/etc. thing; I try to do my best, and when I screw up I try to be graceful about it. That's all one can do, really.
[re Wellbutrin]
> The hallucinations were dancing lights--like the light reflecting off the walls refracting into dazzling, bouncing displays. I had visual trails as well--the type you get on MJ--with the movement of my hands or body sometimes.I think those are more what would be described as "illusions" than outright hallucinations -- you saw things in subtly different ways, but you didn't really see things that just weren't there at all (if that makes sense). I saw visual trails when I had the serotonin syndrome (on Effexor XR), BTW. I've heard speculation that LSD (a serotonin-related psychedelic drug which also tends to cause visual trails, among other things) works by blocking some sort of sensory filtering mechanism.
I also had some innocuous auditory illusions -- hearing music in the shower -- on Nardil. I interpreted it as my mind trying to make sense out of the chaos of white noise that the shower makes.
> Nothing scarey. I hallucinate on Neurontin as well from time to time before sleep--but here vivid colorful images and again not scarey although sometimes a bit more gorey than I would prefer.
Those might be hypnagogic hallucinations. These are visions that happen as you're falling asleep. They're usually not narrative like REM sleep dreams are. I've had them a number of times. (Most people have them at some point, but they're much more common among people who have narcolepsy. My guess is that in my case they're related to my sleep disorder.)
> > > Imagine the hazard of driving like that a night with headlights coming at you
> >
> > I don't drive, but I certainly can imagine.
>
> Why not? (if you don't mind the intrusion?)Left home (suburbs) for college when I was 16. Boston (where I went to college) has good public transit, so I never needed to learn to drive (I'm trying to learn now, although it's a pain).
[re cytochrome p450 2d6 deficiency test]
> Thanks for the info. I'll look into it.It's not a common test; a doctor might not be interested in ordering it unless there's a really good reason to believe you might be a slow metaboliser. (What counts as "really good" probably depends on the doctor.)
> > Tried Inderal for the hyperventilation? (Works well for me -- I had some hyperventilation problems when I first started taking Parnate.)
>
> I am trying Inderal. Interesting drug. does stop the hyperventilating generally (not today).I like it for as-needed use. I wouldn't want to take it around the clock, though. It does lower your pulse (which can be a good thing if you're on MAOIs or TCAs, actually). It can cause nightmares as a side effect, which isn't too great.
> Trying to figure out how to take it.
Based on the duration of action, most people with hypertension take it 4 times daily. I take 10-20 mg as needed.
> I'm afraid of Konopin. Not of becoming addicted, but of the withdrawel if I need to quit using it.
Understandable. My experience has been that you can take it on a short-term trial basis -- for a week, say -- without any withdrawal symptoms. (I took it for close to a month once without having problems stopping, but I'm not sure this would be so harmless for everybody.)
> > You could probably safely add a TCA one of the ones with little effect on serotonin (like nortriptyline or desipramine) without having to go off the MAOI.
>
> That seems to be where my pdoc is heading, which is lovely in terms of washout avoidance.I'm considering starting Parnate again cautiously if I tolerate the desipramine and if the DMI helps somewhat. MAOI-TCA combinations generally aren't much of an improvement over one drug or the other, but for some people they work wonders.
> Melancholy does not apply to me--fortunately I guess.
(Do you mean "melancholia," "melancholic featueres," "melancholic depression," etc.?)
> what is RCT?
"randomised controlled trial"
> And, yeah, wouldn't we all like to see some studies after FDA approval?
Hey, occasionally it happens! < g >
> > I hope this helps. Keep in touch. :-)
>
> Elizabeth--it helps a lot.That's nice to read. Thanks.
> Sometimes I just get paralysed with fear of making a decision--just stuck and any nudge helps. :-)
That's a depression thing (indecisiveness). It's a big problem for me too.
-elizabeth
poster:Elizabeth
thread:67742
URL: http://www.dr-bob.org/babble/20010708/msgs/69540.html